Eurovision so far...

My favorites are Hungary and Serbia...

The commentary:

1 Bosnia & Herzegovina Maria ŠESTIĆ Rijeka Bez Imena
Her dress looks like the top of some hut in Polynesia. Her voice is OK, but the song is slow and boring, and lacking any kind of real tune…

2 Spain D'NASH I Love You Mi Vida
Hah! A boy band! Disco fever baby!

3 Belarus Koldun Work Your Magic
Uh, WTF? Who do you think you are? James Bond? Well, guess what. You’re not! Oh, and you need to learn how to match your makeup to your skin color. Or lay off that spray-tan shit. And button up your shirt please…

4 Ireland DERVISH They Can't Stop The Spring
OK. This is the first Irish singer I’ve heard who doesn’t have a fantastic voice. Very off-key. Too bad, because the song is otherwise good…

5 Finland Hanna PAKARINEN Leave Me Alone
Yes. Please leave me alone… (actually, this isn't too bad)

6 FYR Macedonia Karolina Mojot Svet
Her short skirt doesn’t really make up for the song being dull though. Apparently she has lots of friends in the former Yugoslav republic, so she’ll get a few votes. Even though she doesn’t deserve them.

7 Slovenia Alenka GOTAR Cvet Z Juga
Opera meets rock. Didn’t Nightwish try this already? This will probably do well in the points, the ex-Yugoslav bloc and all. She does have a nice voice, but I think she could do better with it…

8 Hungary Magdi RÚZSA Unsubstantial Blues
Wow… great voice!!! Lots of power. I also like that she looks… um… normal. My favorite so far…

9 Lithuania 4FUN Love Or Leave
The singer is also normal-looking (i.e. not a skanky bimbette)… very nice ballad…

10 Greece Sarbel Yassou Maria
Ææææææ!!! The first “Hatten är din” of the evening. And this is also an example of why I want the return of the rule where the artists have to sing in their native language. Grenglish ick. The only thing this guy is missing is the unbuttoned shirt…

11 Georgia Sopho Visionary Dream
Very 80s… plus a touch of Björk-wannabe… the background dancers make it all the more amusing…

12 Sweden THE ARK The Worrying Kind
What. The. Fuck. Is. That. ?. She-male 70s glam… Think The Sweet… (OK, you can put your shirt back on. Please!)

13 France LES FATALS PICARDS L'amour À La Française
Oh my FSM. It just gets “better and better.” Lots of black and hot pink. On men. French men, but still. It’s nice to see that thte French have a sense of humor… and the song is actually quite good…

14 Latvia BONAPARTI.LV Questa Notte
Oooh, more opera. Charming… tuxedo jackets and shirts, top hats, with jeans. The song is quite nice, energetic for being a ballad…

15 Russia SEREBRO Song #1
Here come the skanky bimbettes… can’t say much more…

16 Germany Roger CICERO Frauen Regier'n Die Welt
OK, he’s dressed like 30s/40s Chicago, same musical style, but in German? (OK, he switched to English) But OK, he can sing…

17 Serbia Marija ŠERIFOVIĆ Molitva
She’s probably a lesbian (she has that anything-but-skanky-bimbette look), but she has a good, powerful voice and the song is very good… this is another one of my favorites…

18 Ukraine Verka SERDUCHKA Dancing Lasha Tumbai
What’s Eurovision without a drag queen? ;-) The costumes are… um… silvery special. Sieben sieben ein zwei drei… charming… very old Soviet bloc meets psycho German nihilist Kraftwerk techno… I have my pocket calculator… this definitely wins the cheezefest, but I don’t really get why it’s one of the favorites…

19 United Kingdom SCOOCH Flying The Flag (For You)
Why is this song even here? (btw – this is the Eurovision example of what British Airways has been reduced to) *ugh*

20 Romania TODOMONDO Liubi, Liubi, I Love You
Very Vaudville… *shudder*

21 Bulgaria Elitsa TODOROVA & Stoyan YANKOULOV Water
Oh for the love of the FSM, is this another Björk wannabe or something?

22 Turkey Kenan DOĞULU Shake It Up, Shekerim
Hatten är din, hatten är din, hatt baby hatt baby…

23 Armenia Hayko Anytime You Need
Anytime I need to kick someone in the nuts… at least he had the decency to keep his shirt buttoned up…

24 Moldova Natalia BARBU Fight
Hike up your trousers, please. Nobody wants to see your skanky crack... you have to shave to wear trousers like that...